Many Ways To Define The Best

Many Ways To Define “The Best” Some parents wrote to me and asked me to contribute my opinions to a College Confidential thread about the pressure to load up on AP classes. Obviously my response is directed to parents, but I thought it was important enough to post it here as well: As with most of my posts in the parents forum, Ill try to respond both as an MIT adcom and also as a parent. Thisll be sortof long, sorry. First, the MIT adcom perspective. I dont know the exact numbers; I couldnt tell you even if I thought it would be helpful. Numbers mean nothing to us because ~70% of our applicant pool is qualified in those terms. Based on the thousands of apps I saw last year both in selection committee and as a reader, I can tell you that the average # of APs for admitted kids was 5 or 6 (thats total for all 4 years of HS i.e. 1-2 per year if evenly distributed). Many admits (most likely the majority) had no college classes. The most common APs taken were in math and science (no surprise, its MIT). The overwhelming majority got 4s and 5s on all tests. Ill pause here to add that I frequently saw kids with perfect SAT scores and perfect grades and a gazillion AP classes get rejected. Why? Because often these kids knew how to grind, but brought nothing else to the table. And thats not who were looking for at MIT. We admit kids who show genuine passion. Sure APs can be one of many passion indicators but I emphasize one of many. When I was on the road, kids asked me repeatedly whether or not they should take a given AP class. Well, Id respond, would you be taking it because you genuinely want to, or simply because you think it will get you into college? Sometimes they didnt know the difference, which is a tragedy that deserves its own thread. But I digress. And this is where you all start saying that adcoms are talking out of both sides of our mouths: we encourage kids to follow their hearts in the choices they make, and then as adcoms we want to see that theyve taken the most challenging courseload. To which I say: guys, I work for MIT! If a kid doesnt want to be taking a challenging courseload in high school, that kid is certainly not going to be happy here. Quite simply, the students who are happiest here are those who thrive on challenge. Most of our admits have taken AP math and science because they would have been bored silly in the regular classes. Indeed, they genuinely wanted to take those classes. They dont look at MIT as the prize; they look at MIT as the logical next step. Its an important distinction. That said, APs are not the only way to demonstrate that one is passionate and likes challenge. Read Anthonys story for an example. When faced with the choice, we will always choose the right match* over numbers. Were not lying when we say that. Youve heard me beat that sentiment to death in other threads, so I wont do so here. (*Match = mission, collaborative spirit, hands-on, balance, character, and passion, among others.) But the reality is that when you have 10,500+ applications for ~1000 spots and 70% of the pool has great numbers, your pool is going to have plenty of kids who have the passion and the match and the scores/grades/APs. So we admit those kids what other choice do we have? But then (understandably) you guys say Look! You need X, Y, and Z to get into MIT! To clarify, we dont require those things; many of our admits just happen to have them. And, I might add, for the right reasons. This brings me to the more important part, where we toss my affiliation with MIT out the window and I give you my thoughts as a parent. There is only one coin. There are many sides to the coin, but there is only one coin. And you can flip it however you like. So when a parent says to me, Why does HYPSM (Harvard, Yale, Princeton, Stanford, MIT, etc.) put so much emphasis on APs? I reply Why do you put so much emphasis on HYPSM? When a parent says My kids value as a person/student shouldnt be measured by how many APs he/she has taken I say and your kids value as a person/student shouldnt be measured by whether or not he/she goes to HYPSM. I could go on and on. There are literally hundreds of amazing colleges and universities out there (some of which actually admit kids with no APs!). Many of them would actually be better matches for your child. Many of them would provide your child with a better education. Most importantly, many of them would ultimately give your child a greater sense of happiness and fulfillment. The right match will do that. And the match goes both ways. We try to determine if your kid is a good match for MIT. Your kid should be trying to determine which school is the best match for him/her. As a parent, what are you doing to help him/her figure that out? Heres a hint: if youre spending time obsessing that a lack of APs is going to keep your kid out of Stanford, youre missing the point. As I told the kids in my blog, I had a wonderful college experience that I wouldnt trade for anything, at a school that is currently only #23 on the USNWR LAC list (The HORROR!). I got a phenomenal education and can certainly hold my own against any Ivy grad. Bonus: I even got to grow up, get married, have kids, buy a house, land a great job, and enjoy life. I took one AP class in high school. Make sure your kids are choosing their schools for the right reasons. Name, status, brand these are not the right reasons. Let your kids be kids. Let them follow their hearts. Encourage them to have a present, not just a future. Dont let them define themselves by which colleges accept them and dont let them define themselves by doing things only to get into certain colleges. The machine is fed from all sides. USNWR, the media in general, the GCs, the parents, the colleges and universities, the high-priced independent counselors, the test prep people My kids are still many years away from college, and Im no expert on the parent side of this process. But I do know one thing: I will fight to protect them from all of this, to help them with perspective and clarity. Because if I dont, who will? Because if we dont, who will? Just my 2 cents, for what its worth. More often than not, what society deems the best is not actually the best for most.